I live my life most days like it is mine. Like my husband and children are duties along with all of the other things I "have" to do. Thankfully I enjoy them. It is a blessing that just is - I love people. People are amazing. Especially my family - and for the most part God has given me the ability to love genuinely and with little effort, most people. Of course there are a couple that come along that are hard to love. I can say that because I am one of those people that make it tough. I believe that I am a difficult friend. So when my counterparts come along - it throws me. I see myself in them and I do not like them. I can love them. I can understand them. But - wow - it's hard to love them well.
I would say in the past year, God has given me a true glimpse at who I am. It has changed my perspective. Little by little I see things that I did not see before. I am not a lovely person. This was a gift given to me by God. And I know it sounds bizarre, but the gift is, finally understanding that there is no good thing in me - apart from God.
What is so great about this gift is - it gives me humility- and it is hard to look down on others when I see how very sorry I am. It has allowed me to see that my standard for my friends is high. Very high. I was a slave to that standard myself. And I expected it of my friends. So - when they failed me - I pulled away. Not in a "I am mad at you and never speaking to you again" way. It was a very subtle withholding of my love from them. I did not call. I did not fellowship.
What an egotistical, and nauseating way to live my life. God has called me to a much more satisfying and blessed life than that. I never saw it. I thought I was the best friend EVER. I would have bent over backwards for these folks. And when they failed me, when my standards were not met, I felt betrayed - BY THEM. So in my hurt - I distanced myself. I did this when I was younger as well. But it was not so subtle. It was the ever so clever "You are not my friend anymore" said directly to the face. And I meant it. So - as I got a little older, I saw the error of my ways and fixed what I thought my problem was. You cannot give up on your friends. So I stayed friends with them. I just quit investing myself emotionally into them. Because it hurt when I was let down. See? No change really. Just more of the same. Me. Controlling "my" life. And that is not friendship. Nor is it what God has called me to do.
So - when God gave me a glimpse of myself. I was grossed out. Truly repelled by who I was when I tried to take control. My instincts, my attitude, my abilities - mean nothing when they are not sifted through the loving and capable hands of my heavenly Father - WHO has made me in HIS image. And has given me gifts that will serve me well as the daughter of a King. And there is the dicotomy again - I am unlovely on my own - but made in the image of Christ - apart from him - I am nothing. With him I am lovely.
The gift of humility that was given also gave me a genuine gratitude. God loves me - in spite of my unlovableness. As I am. Oh - he sees the ugly alright. And he loves me anyway. Amazing. I saw how I stomped across people in my desire to be noticed and thought well of - he saw that too and was so sad. I saw how my pursuits each day were for myself alone. My closet narcissim knew no bounds: the meals I made and took to people - the Sunday School class I taught - when I would sing. It was to glorify myself. To make me feel better about who I was.
When all along, I was so much more than I realized. I still struggle with my selfishness. I forget how ugly I really am. But still God opens my eyes every so often, he still gives me those glimpses and it brings me up short. When I see these things about myself...my loving, heavenly Father opens his arms and bids me come to him - and I do. I linger there...I see the gifts of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness and faithfulness. The freedom to live as his child and to enjoy these gifts in full.
How blessed am I?
I am trying to re-engage. To find the place that God wants me to serve. But for the right reasons. Not to please others so I can feel good about myself. But questioning where would God have me be? It's not easy. I feel that people think that I am doing nothing right now. But I cannot worry about what they think. That is part of that "me monster" (thanks Brian Regan) that I cannot stand to see come out. But I know that he will direct me and that he is using me - in the raising of my children as image bearers of their heavenly Father. And he has given me a vast calling on my daily life, in every person I speak to and every task I put my hand to."Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters" Colossians 3:23
Galatians 5:
13 You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love. 14 For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”15 If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other.
16 So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. 17 For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law.
19 The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 25 Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.
Monday, January 24, 2011
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
To Slog or To SOAR.
I've been slogging through life again for the past week.
Slogging - transitive verb: To PLOD (one's way) perseveringly especially against difficulty.
I didn't think it was a word. I thought I made it up - it is what I FELT like I was doing. But - there it is - in Webster's online dictionary. Apparently someone else has been slogging too.
It's almost like an onomatopoeia.
Anyway - I have managed to get myself back into a blue streak and have become overwhelmed with my little life. A couple of weeks ago - it was so big and expansive and it was exciting and amazing and then this last week has been plodding. slogging.
Apparently this is my natural tendency. To fly off into the stratosphere and then to plummet to the depths. It's exhausting. But does it have to be? Can I not somehow skip the very lows? Or at least dip a little less lower? Or is this what I have to expect now?
I have also found that there is a direct connection to my lows with sin. And seperation. Which to a Kingdom minded person translates to falling away from Christ. Not in a apostasaic (that one is NOT in the dictionary) way, but in what I have come to find is a natural cycle with me. A drawing near and falling away pattern that I would like to see less of the falling away happen. I trust that it can be done.
I happen to be exhausted by life right now. The getting up and hitting the ground running every day and not stopping until bedtime is too much for me. The continued pressure of feeling the need to redeem the time - making every moment count - wears on me, and I find I hear the whisper of the serpent very well when I get tired. And I am still not doing some of the things that I want to. And because of my dissatisfaction, the serpents voice is loud and clear.
To be honest, there is no simple solution to this. I have backed up and started over in my mind in pretty much every direction I can and I always find myself back to being overwhelmed. But this is me. Trying to fix it. On my own.
I woke up this morning to grab the bull by the horns, to make a plan and to act on it. I carefully routed and re-routed and found that I cannot do it. Not alone.
Is there a simple solution? One that does not end up with me feeling like I am being pinched in that place where all the stress balls up at the base of my neck?
I read Isaiah 40. Apparently my over-whelm-ed-ness is just a sight problem. I am not seeing clearly. I have placed my sights on my circumstances once again. I am not focusing on the hills from whence comes my help.
Once I read Isaiah 40 there was an immediate and physical release of a very real tension on my part. I breathed a sigh of relief. I have a very real God. And my God is BIG. He holds my life and the lives of all in his hands. He is a good God, a loving father, an attentive shepherd. He will give me rest. He will renew my strength so that I will no longer slog - but SOAR. And that is that. How sweet it is!
Isaiah 40
Comfort for God’s People
1 Comfort, comfort my people,
says your God.
2 Speak tenderly to Jerusalem,
and proclaim to her
that her hard service has been completed,
that her sin has been paid for,
that she has received from the LORD’s hand
double for all her sins.
3 A voice of one calling:
“In the wilderness prepare
the way for the LORD;
make straight in the desert
a highway for our God.
4 Every valley shall be raised up,
every mountain and hill made low;
the rough ground shall become level,
the rugged places a plain.
5 And the glory of the LORD will be revealed,
and all people will see it together.
For the mouth of the LORD has spoken.”
6 A voice says, “Cry out.”
And I said, “What shall I cry?”
“All people are like grass,
and all their faithfulness is like the flowers of the field.
7 The grass withers and the flowers fall,
because the breath of the LORD blows on them.
Surely the people are grass.
8 The grass withers and the flowers fall,
but the word of our God endures forever.”
9 You who bring good news to Zion,
go up on a high mountain.
You who bring good news to Jerusalem,
lift up your voice with a shout,
lift it up, do not be afraid;
say to the towns of Judah,
“Here is your God!”
10 See, the Sovereign LORD comes with power,
and he rules with a mighty arm.
See, his reward is with him,
and his recompense accompanies him.
11 He tends his flock like a shepherd:
He gathers the lambs in his arms
and carries them close to his heart;
he gently leads those that have young.
12 Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand,
or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens?
Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket,
or weighed the mountains on the scales
and the hills in a balance?
13 Who can fathom the Spirit of the LORD,
or instruct the LORD as his counselor?
14 Whom did the LORD consult to enlighten him,
and who taught him the right way?
Who was it that taught him knowledge,
or showed him the path of understanding?
15 Surely the nations are like a drop in a bucket;
they are regarded as dust on the scales;
he weighs the islands as though they were fine dust.
16 Lebanon is not sufficient for altar fires,
nor its animals enough for burnt offerings.
17 Before him all the nations are as nothing;
they are regarded by him as worthless
and less than nothing.
18 With whom, then, will you compare God?
To what image will you liken him?
19 As for an idol, a metalworker casts it,
and a goldsmith overlays it with gold
and fashions silver chains for it.
20 A person too poor to present such an offering
selects wood that will not rot;
they look for a skilled worker
to set up an idol that will not topple.
21 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
Has it not been told you from the beginning?
Have you not understood since the earth was founded?
22 He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth,
and its people are like grasshoppers.
He stretches out the heavens like a canopy,
and spreads them out like a tent to live in.
23 He brings princes to naught
and reduces the rulers of this world to nothing.
24 No sooner are they planted,
no sooner are they sown,
no sooner do they take root in the ground,
than he blows on them and they wither,
and a whirlwind sweeps them away like chaff.
25 “To whom will you compare me?
Or who is my equal?” says the Holy One.
26 Lift up your eyes and look to the heavens:
Who created all these?
He who brings out the starry host one by one
and calls forth each of them by name.
Because of his great power and mighty strength,
not one of them is missing.
27 Why do you complain, Jacob?
Why do you say, Israel,
“My way is hidden from the LORD;
my cause is disregarded by my God”?
28 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
Slogging - transitive verb: To PLOD (one's way) perseveringly especially against difficulty.
I didn't think it was a word. I thought I made it up - it is what I FELT like I was doing. But - there it is - in Webster's online dictionary. Apparently someone else has been slogging too.
It's almost like an onomatopoeia.
Anyway - I have managed to get myself back into a blue streak and have become overwhelmed with my little life. A couple of weeks ago - it was so big and expansive and it was exciting and amazing and then this last week has been plodding. slogging.
Apparently this is my natural tendency. To fly off into the stratosphere and then to plummet to the depths. It's exhausting. But does it have to be? Can I not somehow skip the very lows? Or at least dip a little less lower? Or is this what I have to expect now?
I have also found that there is a direct connection to my lows with sin. And seperation. Which to a Kingdom minded person translates to falling away from Christ. Not in a apostasaic (that one is NOT in the dictionary) way, but in what I have come to find is a natural cycle with me. A drawing near and falling away pattern that I would like to see less of the falling away happen. I trust that it can be done.
I happen to be exhausted by life right now. The getting up and hitting the ground running every day and not stopping until bedtime is too much for me. The continued pressure of feeling the need to redeem the time - making every moment count - wears on me, and I find I hear the whisper of the serpent very well when I get tired. And I am still not doing some of the things that I want to. And because of my dissatisfaction, the serpents voice is loud and clear.
To be honest, there is no simple solution to this. I have backed up and started over in my mind in pretty much every direction I can and I always find myself back to being overwhelmed. But this is me. Trying to fix it. On my own.
I woke up this morning to grab the bull by the horns, to make a plan and to act on it. I carefully routed and re-routed and found that I cannot do it. Not alone.
Is there a simple solution? One that does not end up with me feeling like I am being pinched in that place where all the stress balls up at the base of my neck?
I read Isaiah 40. Apparently my over-whelm-ed-ness is just a sight problem. I am not seeing clearly. I have placed my sights on my circumstances once again. I am not focusing on the hills from whence comes my help.
Once I read Isaiah 40 there was an immediate and physical release of a very real tension on my part. I breathed a sigh of relief. I have a very real God. And my God is BIG. He holds my life and the lives of all in his hands. He is a good God, a loving father, an attentive shepherd. He will give me rest. He will renew my strength so that I will no longer slog - but SOAR. And that is that. How sweet it is!
Isaiah 40
Comfort for God’s People
1 Comfort, comfort my people,
says your God.
2 Speak tenderly to Jerusalem,
and proclaim to her
that her hard service has been completed,
that her sin has been paid for,
that she has received from the LORD’s hand
double for all her sins.
3 A voice of one calling:
“In the wilderness prepare
the way for the LORD;
make straight in the desert
a highway for our God.
4 Every valley shall be raised up,
every mountain and hill made low;
the rough ground shall become level,
the rugged places a plain.
5 And the glory of the LORD will be revealed,
and all people will see it together.
For the mouth of the LORD has spoken.”
6 A voice says, “Cry out.”
And I said, “What shall I cry?”
“All people are like grass,
and all their faithfulness is like the flowers of the field.
7 The grass withers and the flowers fall,
because the breath of the LORD blows on them.
Surely the people are grass.
8 The grass withers and the flowers fall,
but the word of our God endures forever.”
9 You who bring good news to Zion,
go up on a high mountain.
You who bring good news to Jerusalem,
lift up your voice with a shout,
lift it up, do not be afraid;
say to the towns of Judah,
“Here is your God!”
10 See, the Sovereign LORD comes with power,
and he rules with a mighty arm.
See, his reward is with him,
and his recompense accompanies him.
11 He tends his flock like a shepherd:
He gathers the lambs in his arms
and carries them close to his heart;
he gently leads those that have young.
12 Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand,
or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens?
Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket,
or weighed the mountains on the scales
and the hills in a balance?
13 Who can fathom the Spirit of the LORD,
or instruct the LORD as his counselor?
14 Whom did the LORD consult to enlighten him,
and who taught him the right way?
Who was it that taught him knowledge,
or showed him the path of understanding?
15 Surely the nations are like a drop in a bucket;
they are regarded as dust on the scales;
he weighs the islands as though they were fine dust.
16 Lebanon is not sufficient for altar fires,
nor its animals enough for burnt offerings.
17 Before him all the nations are as nothing;
they are regarded by him as worthless
and less than nothing.
18 With whom, then, will you compare God?
To what image will you liken him?
19 As for an idol, a metalworker casts it,
and a goldsmith overlays it with gold
and fashions silver chains for it.
20 A person too poor to present such an offering
selects wood that will not rot;
they look for a skilled worker
to set up an idol that will not topple.
21 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
Has it not been told you from the beginning?
Have you not understood since the earth was founded?
22 He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth,
and its people are like grasshoppers.
He stretches out the heavens like a canopy,
and spreads them out like a tent to live in.
23 He brings princes to naught
and reduces the rulers of this world to nothing.
24 No sooner are they planted,
no sooner are they sown,
no sooner do they take root in the ground,
than he blows on them and they wither,
and a whirlwind sweeps them away like chaff.
25 “To whom will you compare me?
Or who is my equal?” says the Holy One.
26 Lift up your eyes and look to the heavens:
Who created all these?
He who brings out the starry host one by one
and calls forth each of them by name.
Because of his great power and mighty strength,
not one of them is missing.
27 Why do you complain, Jacob?
Why do you say, Israel,
“My way is hidden from the LORD;
my cause is disregarded by my God”?
28 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
Monday, January 3, 2011
You Must Read This...I love it - Signs of Life
http://www.turningpointonline.org/site/R/?i=TT6dhv6WUs6OgEEkBhRtNg..
Pop Stars
You will know them by their fruits...by their fruits you will know them.
Matthew 7:16, 20
Recommended Reading
Matthew 7:15-20
How hot was it last summer? According to the newspapers, it was so hot in the southern United States that a farmer in Elizabethtown, Kentucky, reported that his corn popped on the stalk. A Hardin County farmer also claimed that some of the ears among his rows of corn started popping in the intense heat. He sent photos of the burst kernels to specialists who said such a phenomenon is possible, though rare. Talk about signs of life! Can you imagine walking through a cornfield and hearing popping sounds all around you?
When we walk among the rows of Christians at church, are there any signs of life? When you look in the mirror as the day begins, are there any bursts of joy and claps of praise? When things get hot, is there an explosion of trust in God and kindness toward others?
As followers of Christ, there should be "signs" that we are alive in Him. When Jesus said, "By their fruits you will know them," He was telling us that Christianity must be fruitful. Are you bursting with joy today?
The time is short, and we must not only work while it is day; we must bear fruit while it is the season for fruit.
A. J. Gordon
Pop Stars
You will know them by their fruits...by their fruits you will know them.
Matthew 7:16, 20
Recommended Reading
Matthew 7:15-20
How hot was it last summer? According to the newspapers, it was so hot in the southern United States that a farmer in Elizabethtown, Kentucky, reported that his corn popped on the stalk. A Hardin County farmer also claimed that some of the ears among his rows of corn started popping in the intense heat. He sent photos of the burst kernels to specialists who said such a phenomenon is possible, though rare. Talk about signs of life! Can you imagine walking through a cornfield and hearing popping sounds all around you?
When we walk among the rows of Christians at church, are there any signs of life? When you look in the mirror as the day begins, are there any bursts of joy and claps of praise? When things get hot, is there an explosion of trust in God and kindness toward others?
As followers of Christ, there should be "signs" that we are alive in Him. When Jesus said, "By their fruits you will know them," He was telling us that Christianity must be fruitful. Are you bursting with joy today?
The time is short, and we must not only work while it is day; we must bear fruit while it is the season for fruit.
A. J. Gordon
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Starting Over?
There is something about a new year that causes folks to want to start all over again. Their expectations for the coming year are bright and shiny and hopeful. They are going to lose weight, read more, spend more time with loved ones, work harder to become organized. I absolutely get it. I am usually on that band wagon with all my shiny new expectations as well.
But of course, after a few weeks or months (if I'm lucky) - the shiny is worn off. So the last couple of years, I have more or less backed off on the resolutions. It seems to be setting myself up for failure. This is a defeatest attitude though. It is wrong.
I have determined that this year I will start over every day. I will rise from my bed, bless the Lord and ask for his blessings and start every day new. I somehow like the idea that I can begin again every day - even moment by moment if I need to.
My thinking goes like this: I have a tendency to throw my hands in the air and give up when I have a huge goal and I miss it. Such as dieting - if I have a moment of weakness and eat a brownie that has been offered me, my thinking tends to be - "Well I screwed up", and I eat like a failure the rest of the day - or week. Can't do that. That's flabby behavior. And flabby behavior makes for a flabby body. That carries over to every other thing I put my hand to as well. Work. Home. Play. Kingdom.
I think what excited me today is the idea that I have a chance moment by moment to begin again. I will not be able to see my goals made each year. Not even each day sometimes. But by deciding moment by moment to live faithfully, I expect that I will be further along in a year than I could have ever been by setting my huge list of New Year's Resolutions and doing my normal "give up".
Hebrews 12:1-3 (New International Version, ©2010)
1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
I do not want to lose heart. I want to run the race faithfully. I am full of hope for this year. I pray that in all things that I will be faithful. That I will set my mind on things above and remember that my steps are moment by moment - and by doing them one at a time that I will indeed see change in myself that resembles my heavenly Father. I want to show hospitality more consistently, to accomplish more in my home, and in my job, I want to love my co-workers better and succeed not only in that but doing my job well. I want to see the creativity God gave me accomplished. I want to love my husband better, and to live more faithfully before my children.
I love the idea that when I end my day and wake up to a new day - that I will see God's mercies - every day. Amazing. Encouraging. Blessed.
Lamentations 3:22-24 (New International Version, ©2010)
22 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
23 They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
24 I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him.”
But of course, after a few weeks or months (if I'm lucky) - the shiny is worn off. So the last couple of years, I have more or less backed off on the resolutions. It seems to be setting myself up for failure. This is a defeatest attitude though. It is wrong.
I have determined that this year I will start over every day. I will rise from my bed, bless the Lord and ask for his blessings and start every day new. I somehow like the idea that I can begin again every day - even moment by moment if I need to.
My thinking goes like this: I have a tendency to throw my hands in the air and give up when I have a huge goal and I miss it. Such as dieting - if I have a moment of weakness and eat a brownie that has been offered me, my thinking tends to be - "Well I screwed up", and I eat like a failure the rest of the day - or week. Can't do that. That's flabby behavior. And flabby behavior makes for a flabby body. That carries over to every other thing I put my hand to as well. Work. Home. Play. Kingdom.
I think what excited me today is the idea that I have a chance moment by moment to begin again. I will not be able to see my goals made each year. Not even each day sometimes. But by deciding moment by moment to live faithfully, I expect that I will be further along in a year than I could have ever been by setting my huge list of New Year's Resolutions and doing my normal "give up".
Hebrews 12:1-3 (New International Version, ©2010)
1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3 Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
I do not want to lose heart. I want to run the race faithfully. I am full of hope for this year. I pray that in all things that I will be faithful. That I will set my mind on things above and remember that my steps are moment by moment - and by doing them one at a time that I will indeed see change in myself that resembles my heavenly Father. I want to show hospitality more consistently, to accomplish more in my home, and in my job, I want to love my co-workers better and succeed not only in that but doing my job well. I want to see the creativity God gave me accomplished. I want to love my husband better, and to live more faithfully before my children.
I lay it before you all - that I will be accountable in my endeavors.
I love the idea that when I end my day and wake up to a new day - that I will see God's mercies - every day. Amazing. Encouraging. Blessed.
Lamentations 3:22-24 (New International Version, ©2010)
22 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
23 They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
24 I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him.”
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Living at Odds
I absolutely LOVE reading my devotional each day. I love how when I come down and click on it there in my e-mail that I know something that makes me who I am in Christ will be confirmed. I will be affirmed. I will be encouraged. Encouraged to encourage others and to give from the flood of blessings that come to me from God. How is it I manage to fall away? It puzzles me - but I do, and I will - more than likely - but for now, what a wonderful place to be.
In my reading of David Jeremiah and his e-devotional this morning, for todays blog will be mostly about my thoughts on my reading and ruminations from it, he pointed out that there are many things that are at odds in kingdom living.
"Many things about the kingdom of God seem odd to those who are not its citizens. Kingdom citizens gain by giving, live by dying, and become great by becoming least. But perhaps the greatest oddity in the kingdom of God is when Christians find joy in pain and suffering. There is something unnatural about rejoicing in the midst of trials."
-David Jeremiah
This thrilled me. I literally had goosebumps. If you have read at all of my last year - then you know that I have had a few trials. They were less than some folks but to me they have been horrifying at times, so painful and I have been broken and sad. So sad. But one thing I know about myself is - I am a weenie. I am not made of stern stuff. So my trials would be blips in someone elses life, although I must say some of them were pretty big blows. Anyway - all that to say - I understand about finding joy in pain and suffering. I have it. It has been the oddest thing but I truly love being where I am. I have never depended on my heavenly Father more for my daily bread, for my and my family's needs - both spiritual and physical or for my happiness.
Not only can we find joy in suffering - but I have found that in order to GAIN, we are to GIVE. One more thing that has been impressed upon me. The hoarding and living like we have nothing to offer is wrong. We have plenty to offer. It may not be from a huge house with a man cave ( I admit - I would love a man cave for all the man cubs in my household), BUT it is a warm, sweet little house that has good food and laughter, a lake right down the street for one of life's more enjoyable pass-times (fishing) and a hill for sliding - whether leafy or snowy(HA) - yes - we have hill surfing and I offer it up to those who would like to give it a whirl. We have so much to offer.
David Jeremiah points out that the Bible does not say give thanks FOR everything but to give God thanks IN everything. No matter what we go through we are to thank God for the blessings we do have. To find a grateful heart in the midst of our hardships. God gave me the ability to do so. With every new hardship, I thanked God for what we had. For we are rich. We have much. We are not paupers - spiritually or physically.
And the most important spiritually impressive point being, believers DIE to themselves in order to LIVE life to the fullest. In dying to ourselves we find that we truly live. This is an amazing and liberating find. If one can find a way to understand this wonderful concept (pray for it friends - it will come, and if you are like me understanding will go, then come back again - as long as you keep on - keep on) life will become more full than it could ever be imagined.
I love living a life of paradox. It has been an amazing thing to find that in the midst of all the hard stuff that goes on, there absolutely can be joy.
1 Peter 1:3-7 (New King James Version)
3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 to an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled and that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, 5 who are kept by the power of God through faith for salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
6 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ,
In my reading of David Jeremiah and his e-devotional this morning, for todays blog will be mostly about my thoughts on my reading and ruminations from it, he pointed out that there are many things that are at odds in kingdom living.
"Many things about the kingdom of God seem odd to those who are not its citizens. Kingdom citizens gain by giving, live by dying, and become great by becoming least. But perhaps the greatest oddity in the kingdom of God is when Christians find joy in pain and suffering. There is something unnatural about rejoicing in the midst of trials."
-David Jeremiah
This thrilled me. I literally had goosebumps. If you have read at all of my last year - then you know that I have had a few trials. They were less than some folks but to me they have been horrifying at times, so painful and I have been broken and sad. So sad. But one thing I know about myself is - I am a weenie. I am not made of stern stuff. So my trials would be blips in someone elses life, although I must say some of them were pretty big blows. Anyway - all that to say - I understand about finding joy in pain and suffering. I have it. It has been the oddest thing but I truly love being where I am. I have never depended on my heavenly Father more for my daily bread, for my and my family's needs - both spiritual and physical or for my happiness.
Not only can we find joy in suffering - but I have found that in order to GAIN, we are to GIVE. One more thing that has been impressed upon me. The hoarding and living like we have nothing to offer is wrong. We have plenty to offer. It may not be from a huge house with a man cave ( I admit - I would love a man cave for all the man cubs in my household), BUT it is a warm, sweet little house that has good food and laughter, a lake right down the street for one of life's more enjoyable pass-times (fishing) and a hill for sliding - whether leafy or snowy(HA) - yes - we have hill surfing and I offer it up to those who would like to give it a whirl. We have so much to offer.
David Jeremiah points out that the Bible does not say give thanks FOR everything but to give God thanks IN everything. No matter what we go through we are to thank God for the blessings we do have. To find a grateful heart in the midst of our hardships. God gave me the ability to do so. With every new hardship, I thanked God for what we had. For we are rich. We have much. We are not paupers - spiritually or physically.
And the most important spiritually impressive point being, believers DIE to themselves in order to LIVE life to the fullest. In dying to ourselves we find that we truly live. This is an amazing and liberating find. If one can find a way to understand this wonderful concept (pray for it friends - it will come, and if you are like me understanding will go, then come back again - as long as you keep on - keep on) life will become more full than it could ever be imagined.
I love living a life of paradox. It has been an amazing thing to find that in the midst of all the hard stuff that goes on, there absolutely can be joy.
1 Peter 1:3-7 (New King James Version)
3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 to an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled and that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, 5 who are kept by the power of God through faith for salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
6 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ,
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Proverbs 30
Proverbs 30
Sayings of Agur
1 The sayings of Agur son of Jakeh—an inspired utterance.
This man’s utterance to Ithiel:
“I am weary, God,
but I can prevail.
2 Surely I am only a brute, not a man;
I do not have human understanding.
3 I have not learned wisdom,
nor have I attained to the knowledge of the Holy One.
4 Who has gone up to heaven and come down?
Whose hands have gathered up the wind?
Who has wrapped up the waters in a cloak?
Who has established all the ends of the earth?
What is his name, and what is the name of his son?
Surely you know!
5 “Every word of God is flawless;
he is a shield to those who take refuge in him.
6 Do not add to his words,
or he will rebuke you and prove you a liar.
7 “Two things I ask of you, LORD;
do not refuse me before I die:
8 Keep falsehood and lies far from me;
give me neither poverty nor riches,
but give me only my daily bread.
9 Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you
and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’
Or I may become poor and steal,
and so dishonor the name of my God.
10 “Do not slander servants to their master,
or they will curse you, and you will pay for it.
11 “There are those who curse their fathers
and do not bless their mothers;
12 those who are pure in their own eyes
and yet are not cleansed of their filth;
13 those whose eyes are ever so haughty,
whose glances are so disdainful;
14 those whose teeth are swords
and whose jaws are set with knives
to devour the poor from the earth
and the needy from among humankind.
15 “The leech has two daughters.
‘Give! Give!’ they cry.
“There are three things that are never satisfied,
four that never say, ‘Enough!’:
16 the grave, the barren womb,
land, which is never satisfied with water,
and fire, which never says, ‘Enough!’
17 “The eye that mocks a father,
that scorns an aged mother,
will be pecked out by the ravens of the valley,
will be eaten by the vultures.
18 “There are three things that are too amazing for me,
four that I do not understand:
19 the way of an eagle in the sky,
the way of a snake on a rock,
the way of a ship on the high seas,
and the way of a man with a young woman.
20 “This is the way of an adulterous woman:
She eats and wipes her mouth
and says, ‘I’ve done nothing wrong.’
21 “Under three things the earth trembles,
under four it cannot bear up:
22 a servant who becomes king,
a godless fool who gets plenty to eat,
23 a contemptible woman who gets married,
and a servant who displaces her mistress.
24 “Four things on earth are small,
yet they are extremely wise:
25 Ants are creatures of little strength,
yet they store up their food in the summer;
26 hyraxes are creatures of little power,
yet they make their home in the crags;
27 locusts have no king,
yet they advance together in ranks;
28 a lizard can be caught with the hand,
yet it is found in kings’ palaces.
29 “There are three things that are stately in their stride,
four that move with stately bearing:
30 a lion, mighty among beasts,
who retreats before nothing;
31 a strutting rooster, a he-goat,
and a king secure against revolt.
32 “If you play the fool and exalt yourself,
or if you plan evil, clap your hand over your mouth!
33 For as churning cream produces butter,
and as twisting the nose produces blood,
so stirring up anger produces strife.”
I am amazed at how I seem to connect to Agur. A man from so long ago and yet, I love what he says. I like the randomness of his thought patterns but the truth and simplicity of what he says. My favorite thing he says is:
7 “Two things I ask of you, LORD;
do not refuse me before I die:
8 Keep falsehood and lies far from me;
give me neither poverty nor riches,
but give me only my daily bread.
9 Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you
and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’
Or I may become poor and steal,
and so dishonor the name of my God.
It just makes such good sense. And as you know - I am a HUGE fan of common sense, even though at times I do not show it. I pulled this from my devotional from David Jeremiah today and thought it was worth sharing. Especially given the economy and the preparations for a new year.
Here's the link: http://www.davidjeremiah.org/site/magazine.aspx?id=4402
Prov 30 is from yesterday though.
Sayings of Agur
1 The sayings of Agur son of Jakeh—an inspired utterance.
This man’s utterance to Ithiel:
“I am weary, God,
but I can prevail.
2 Surely I am only a brute, not a man;
I do not have human understanding.
3 I have not learned wisdom,
nor have I attained to the knowledge of the Holy One.
4 Who has gone up to heaven and come down?
Whose hands have gathered up the wind?
Who has wrapped up the waters in a cloak?
Who has established all the ends of the earth?
What is his name, and what is the name of his son?
Surely you know!
5 “Every word of God is flawless;
he is a shield to those who take refuge in him.
6 Do not add to his words,
or he will rebuke you and prove you a liar.
7 “Two things I ask of you, LORD;
do not refuse me before I die:
8 Keep falsehood and lies far from me;
give me neither poverty nor riches,
but give me only my daily bread.
9 Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you
and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’
Or I may become poor and steal,
and so dishonor the name of my God.
10 “Do not slander servants to their master,
or they will curse you, and you will pay for it.
11 “There are those who curse their fathers
and do not bless their mothers;
12 those who are pure in their own eyes
and yet are not cleansed of their filth;
13 those whose eyes are ever so haughty,
whose glances are so disdainful;
14 those whose teeth are swords
and whose jaws are set with knives
to devour the poor from the earth
and the needy from among humankind.
15 “The leech has two daughters.
‘Give! Give!’ they cry.
“There are three things that are never satisfied,
four that never say, ‘Enough!’:
16 the grave, the barren womb,
land, which is never satisfied with water,
and fire, which never says, ‘Enough!’
17 “The eye that mocks a father,
that scorns an aged mother,
will be pecked out by the ravens of the valley,
will be eaten by the vultures.
18 “There are three things that are too amazing for me,
four that I do not understand:
19 the way of an eagle in the sky,
the way of a snake on a rock,
the way of a ship on the high seas,
and the way of a man with a young woman.
20 “This is the way of an adulterous woman:
She eats and wipes her mouth
and says, ‘I’ve done nothing wrong.’
21 “Under three things the earth trembles,
under four it cannot bear up:
22 a servant who becomes king,
a godless fool who gets plenty to eat,
23 a contemptible woman who gets married,
and a servant who displaces her mistress.
24 “Four things on earth are small,
yet they are extremely wise:
25 Ants are creatures of little strength,
yet they store up their food in the summer;
26 hyraxes are creatures of little power,
yet they make their home in the crags;
27 locusts have no king,
yet they advance together in ranks;
28 a lizard can be caught with the hand,
yet it is found in kings’ palaces.
29 “There are three things that are stately in their stride,
four that move with stately bearing:
30 a lion, mighty among beasts,
who retreats before nothing;
31 a strutting rooster, a he-goat,
and a king secure against revolt.
32 “If you play the fool and exalt yourself,
or if you plan evil, clap your hand over your mouth!
33 For as churning cream produces butter,
and as twisting the nose produces blood,
so stirring up anger produces strife.”
I am amazed at how I seem to connect to Agur. A man from so long ago and yet, I love what he says. I like the randomness of his thought patterns but the truth and simplicity of what he says. My favorite thing he says is:
7 “Two things I ask of you, LORD;
do not refuse me before I die:
8 Keep falsehood and lies far from me;
give me neither poverty nor riches,
but give me only my daily bread.
9 Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you
and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’
Or I may become poor and steal,
and so dishonor the name of my God.
It just makes such good sense. And as you know - I am a HUGE fan of common sense, even though at times I do not show it. I pulled this from my devotional from David Jeremiah today and thought it was worth sharing. Especially given the economy and the preparations for a new year.
Here's the link: http://www.davidjeremiah.org/site/magazine.aspx?id=4402
Prov 30 is from yesterday though.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Born to Die
There is an old song that we used to sing at our Easter Cantata when I was a little girl. It was called Born to Die. Every Christmas, I think of it. The fact is that Christ's whole human existence was based on this plan. Without it - there would be no hope.
The fact is, it blows my mind. I don't understand that kind of sacrifice. Though I am grateful for it. Thank goodness Christmas is about so much more than just pretty lights and presents. I am so very thankful for a selfless love - the Greatest Gift.
We who have heard along with the shepherds, the call of the angels to come and see - we are so very blessed -
10 But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. 11 Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. 12 This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.” 13 Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, 14 “Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.” Luke 2
The fact is, it blows my mind. I don't understand that kind of sacrifice. Though I am grateful for it. Thank goodness Christmas is about so much more than just pretty lights and presents. I am so very thankful for a selfless love - the Greatest Gift.
We who have heard along with the shepherds, the call of the angels to come and see - we are so very blessed -
10 But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. 11 Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. 12 This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.” 13 Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, 14 “Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.” Luke 2
Friday, December 17, 2010
This....Means.....War.....
Okay - so, about 4 weeks ago I realized I was clenching my teeth. Apparently stressed and taking it out on my jaws. I got an abscess. Horrid little thing. Painful. Still, I did what I had to. Had a blessed Thanksgiving and come to find out that abscess is not going to get better and it is in a tooth that already had a root canal so they had to pull it. Absolutely nightmarish experience. I seriously urge you never to have a tooth pulled without being put under. It was so bad. And it hurt afterwards too...for days. But meanwhile the electricity has gone bad in my house (something needs to be replaced), the car broke down, I missed my jury duty and figured it out 2 days later at 8:00pm, and feared contempt of court, one kid got sick, the other got sick, I tripped over the dog and twisted my ankle and then got called today that another child had lice, was leaving to go pick him up from school and fell down a flight of stairs. My knee is as big as a grapefruit and I have bruises up one side and down the other. Then as I was washing all of the bed linens and such after shampooing 3 boys with Rid and combing through their hair with a lice comb, the electricity goes wonky again and I can't get the kids blankets dry. So I have to use all kinds of crazy things to make sure they stay warm.
I kid you not.
It has been one of those months.
I am exhausted, mentally, and physically. The one thing I can be thankful for is that God has shown himself faithful through it all. My family is safe, warm and fed. I have everything that I need. We all have everything that we need. Praise God!
I will say though that I feel like I am under attack. There are moments where I would gladly pull my hair out to distract myself from the events that are going on. One. After. The. Other.
I am so tempted to feel sorry for myself. There are many times when I just list the things in my head and can feel myself about to fall headlong into self pity.
But instead of doing that, I find that I am getting angry. It makes me so mad that all of this is going on. And I am pretty sure I know why. God has finally gotten my attention after a deficit of years and Satan is not happy.
So - this means war. My bruised and battered physical and emotional body is tired - my spiritual being will fight back. By putting on the full armour of God.
The Armor of God - Ephesians 6:
10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
Isn't that awesome? I have a defense in this time of extreme stress and conflict.
Philippians 2
1 Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. 5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:
6 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; 7 rather, he made himself nothing
by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death— even death on a cross! 9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.
12 Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, 13 for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose. 14 Do everything without grumbling or arguing, 15 so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.”[c] Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky 16 as you hold firmly to the word of life. And then I will be able to boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor in vain. 17 But even if I am being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. 18 So you too should be glad and rejoice with me.
These passages are such a comfort to me. When I read them, everything in me seems to take a deep breath and relax. I love the Word of God. And Philippians 2 is the Christmas Story - in a nutshell. God became man - humbled himself to serve and save. If that does not give joy - I don't know what does.
So - I am not taking this lying down. I have put up my dukes and have a sure defense in this time of struggle.
It's actually not a bad place to be. Please pray for us. We need the strength that comes from our brothers and sisters lifting us up to our Father. Let's band together and fight the good fight.
1 Timothy 6:11-12
11 But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness. 12 Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confession in the presence of many witnesses.
I kid you not.
It has been one of those months.
I am exhausted, mentally, and physically. The one thing I can be thankful for is that God has shown himself faithful through it all. My family is safe, warm and fed. I have everything that I need. We all have everything that we need. Praise God!
I will say though that I feel like I am under attack. There are moments where I would gladly pull my hair out to distract myself from the events that are going on. One. After. The. Other.
I am so tempted to feel sorry for myself. There are many times when I just list the things in my head and can feel myself about to fall headlong into self pity.
But instead of doing that, I find that I am getting angry. It makes me so mad that all of this is going on. And I am pretty sure I know why. God has finally gotten my attention after a deficit of years and Satan is not happy.
So - this means war. My bruised and battered physical and emotional body is tired - my spiritual being will fight back. By putting on the full armour of God.
The Armor of God - Ephesians 6:
10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
Isn't that awesome? I have a defense in this time of extreme stress and conflict.
Philippians 2
1 Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. 5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:
6 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; 7 rather, he made himself nothing
by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death— even death on a cross! 9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.
12 Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, 13 for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose. 14 Do everything without grumbling or arguing, 15 so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.”[c] Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky 16 as you hold firmly to the word of life. And then I will be able to boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor in vain. 17 But even if I am being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. 18 So you too should be glad and rejoice with me.
These passages are such a comfort to me. When I read them, everything in me seems to take a deep breath and relax. I love the Word of God. And Philippians 2 is the Christmas Story - in a nutshell. God became man - humbled himself to serve and save. If that does not give joy - I don't know what does.
So - I am not taking this lying down. I have put up my dukes and have a sure defense in this time of struggle.
It's actually not a bad place to be. Please pray for us. We need the strength that comes from our brothers and sisters lifting us up to our Father. Let's band together and fight the good fight.
1 Timothy 6:11-12
11 But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness. 12 Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confession in the presence of many witnesses.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)