Danger Will Robinson....Danger

I wish I had a robot that would signal when danger is approaching. I am like the proverbial frog in a pot put on to boil....I adjust with the times and am in danger of boiling to death.

I have been on a bit of a tare lately. I have berated Christians as a whole for being unloving. I am pointing a finger at myself as well. My judgemental attitude towards some things is absolutely wrong. My defensiveness on my pet preferences is highly sensitive. You mess with what I hold sacred I will light into you....

But - what do I hold sacred?

Quite frankly, it's a little hard to tell these days. Other than my family and friends I find I am quite free of other issues.

I find I have become a bit .....ummmm.......lackadaisical in my stand for right and wrong. I think that sometimes I water my beliefs down too much. I don't think I have to stand on a street corner and shout it - or even - heaven forbid -  belittle or condemn others. But I do need to make sure that I am known by my deeds. That I am seen as a follower of Jesus by the love I show and that I do not quell when courage is needed to share a concern in love. I want the vision to make things better. I want the energy and strength to work hard at serving others. I want to let things that do not matter lie and not quibble over silliness. Picking a fight never solved a problem. Generally it creates one. My actions should follow my words. My words should announce my actions.

Politics, wealth and power...these things do not last. Politics is a waste of time and energy. It renders no help to the common man. I will vote my conscience but until this vehicle for human consumption and greed is fixed it is a waste of time. How does one fix the vehicle? I am at a loss.

The pursuit of the almighty dollar is certainly out of our control these days. As far as power is concerned - well I am a control freak but even that is driving me insane. When I look at the big picture - when I see this broken world, it is more than I can bear at times. The bombings, the fear, the desire of others to hurt so many, the selfishness of the government - and I am totally being bipartisan here - it is depressing. It makes me want to give up.

So what is the answer to living in a world that is so very, very broken?

Narrowing my vision.

My first job - loving God, my husband and kids - raising my children - to love God first and foremost, to love others well, to see needs beyond their own is my priority right now. They are the future of this world. Any influence I have on them is right now and will be my best chance at making the future better.

My choice of work will affect many. I love these high school kids. I am scared of them too. I see such potential but I also see kids that have been raised to think of themselves. And more than likely it is by example. They are as a whole without courtesy and without concern when no one is looking. Integrity is lacking. They have the answers for sure. If you ask them what they think is important they will tell you, and mostly it sounds good. But - I do see that there is a difference in their walk and their talk. We have made our kids the center of our universe and it is starting to show.

We have become so self aware that we are not aware of anything else. And our kids are the proof.

But my Special Ed kids at the High School are amazing. I have found my passion. I love substituting there and helping my friends as well as loving on those kids. I think the fact that I will be an outlier from the General Ed may help in my desire to befriend and guide those kids as I work with my sweet Special Ed kids. I am excited about what God has in store. I pray I can be used to point them in the right way. Actually I ask God to help me do that for anyone I am with.

The best way to do that is to keep my eyes peeled. Getting too comfortable and letting people pleasing be most important is not what I am called to do. The more uncomfortable I am - the sharper I am. The more I am reading scripture and calling on God, the better I serve. I have to keep asking God what is best. Not what is best for me - or how can I please others, but how can I truly help.

I do not want to be that proverbial frog in the boiling pot of water. Heaven forbid.

So - reading the Bible, prayer, seeking to serve others and help in the community, teaching my kids to love God, serve others and to guard their hearts, and to respect each other in their words and deeds, these are my first goal. The house and it's state of being shall be a distant concern. heh. Good luck with that. But I will try.

Here's to better focus -